*On a Mickie fan forum/site called The New Extreme http://thenewextreme.com/ somebody asked why it was that we liked girls wrestling, and what lead us to it. And so this was my response*
Well, I like girls... and I like wrestling; thus girls wrestling is the ultimate.
I remember back in the late 90's when Stone Cold Steve Austin was a wrestling god carrying the industry on his back. I didn't care for women's wrestling back then for several reasons:
1. The girls lacked the strength required to do any spectacular tosses and throws.
2. The girls just lacked the ability to perform realistically.
3. Women's matches were nothing more than sex kitten matches; an excuse to show girls in bikinis wiggling around.
I remember not liking female wrestling, but always wishing they'd either do away with it, or at least give these matches some dignity.
Then came Lita. I thought Lita was the coolest woman in the world. She's the one that actually made me want to watch a match between two women. But still, the entire division was treated like a joke, and the matches were just excuses to show eye candy.
The difference was that when Lita entered the picture, it began bothering me more and more that the women's matches were being degraded by bra and panties matches, mud wrestling and other stupid crap. I figured with Lita wrestling, they ought to really do something with the women’s division. Lita can wrestle, see girls can wrestle, give them a chance.
Then I remember Molly Holly, It was like the second coming of Lita.
Then came Trish Stratus; I really could not stand her. Yeah she was hot, but she was such a stupid T&A untalented bimbo. And then they gave her the women's title, and it totally pissed me off that her character became super tough, and she held the belt, just because she was hot looking.
However, as time went by, I noticed Trish improving. Eventually, within the last year or two, I came to respect Trish, but not as much as Lita or Molly Holly.
The women's division was sometimes slightly interesting, and some times pure crap.
Then came Mickie James.
When I first saw Mickie saving Trish, two things came to my mind.
1. Here we go with another Sable and Torrie storyline.
2. Is that Mickie character an Indian, or part Indian? She looks like Pocahontas.
Well after a few weeks, this Mickie character became rather interesting. after a few more weeks, she became very interesting. After a month, she became truly awesome. I would really want to see what Mickie was going to say to Trish next, or what crazy thing she was going to do.
I became fascinated with Mickie. I thought her character was unique, very interesting, and she was great in the ring, and very pretty.
By the time she turned on Trish, I was already hooked on Mickie.
And this might sound really weird, maybe even disturbing, but when I totally fell into Mickie worship was after this one particular scene where she got her nose bloodied, and she wiped the blood with her hand, then tasted her blood, and laughed about it.
That was just totally awesome. She wasn't crying like a little priss. In that brief moment, her psycho persona became ultra convincing.
For me, it was a defining moment in the psycho stalker Mickie character.
And of course Mickie went on to impress me in interviews, and in the ring. And she just kept getting funnier, and crazier, and prettier as time went on.
and of course the more time I spent at Mickie's forum, talking about her, praising her, and all the time I spent making Mickie pictures and banners, and those three shirt concepts, and hoping she might see one of my posts and know I exist, I just totally became obsessed with Mickie.
And now I am a total Mickie maniac, and Mickie has breathed new life into women's wrestling. My interest in women's wrestling goes beyond just Mickie; but into the entire genre of female wrestling.
Hopefully I am not the only one that feels this way. Hopefully many other guys have come to respect women’s wrestling due to people like Lita, Molly Holly, and Mickie James. If so, than it is fair to say Mickie is a hero to the industry of women’s wrestling.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Monday, November 13, 2006
Camels and Horses
-originally written on 10/23/06-
*This was a comical post I made on one of her fan forums. We were talking about Mickie being WWE's Diva Of The Day, and someone mentioned how much Mickie liked horses, and that if I wanted to win her heart, I should learn to go horseback riding. I answered that post and then went into a theatrical play scenario of me trying to convince Mickie that I like horses*
Well let me just say that Mickie is my diva of the day every day! :cool:
And I'm not learning to ride a horse to impress Mickie. I don't trust horses... I suspect they are going to bite at any second!
Of course, I imagine I could always fool her into thinking I like horses. I could get a pony, and claim it's a horse; just a more compact and sporty version. Or maybe when she asks me to go riding with her I will bring a camel.
Mickie: "Jesse... Wolf ol' buddy, that is not a horse. That… that’s a camel!"
Wolfie: “No it isn’t.”
Mickie: “Yes it is. It’s like seven or eight feet tall, it’s got a gigantic neck and two humps on its back.”
Wolfie: "Hey don’t make fun of my horse… fine it's a camel. But hey, they're bigger, smarter, better, and faster than horses."
Mickie: "I don't know about better and smarter, but they're not faster than a horse."
Wolfie: "They can run at twenty five miles an hour, for a full hour. They can walk at nine miles an hour from dawn till dusk. And they can sprint at forty miles an hour. They can haul three hundred and thirty pounds comfortably, and a thousand pounds at maximum.
My camel can go weeks without water. And if I ever begin dying of thirst out in the desert, I can always tap one of these humps for some water."
Mickie: "Ok, first, that's disgusting! Secondly, those humps are fat deposits; they contain no water. Third, there is no giant stretch of desert land anywhere in Virginia. Oh, and did I mention, that's not a horse!"
Wolfie: "Whoa, it's ok there Sand Stallion, don't let her get to you. You're every bit as good as her horse or any other horse around here."
Mickie: “You’re afraid of a five and a half foot horse, but not of a seven foot Dromedary camel!?”
Wolfie: “Camels have pretty eye lashes, and they ain’t got those long mosquito-like faces like horses.”
Mickie: “Jesse, tell your camel to stop spitting on my horse!”
Wolfie: “Tell your horse to quit laughing at my camel!”
Kenny shows up.
Kenny: “Hey Hun, look at my new horse. Now we can go horse riding together. See, I’m not afraid of horses.”
Mickie: “That’s a rhinoceros!”
Kenny: “Umm, no it’s not.”
Mickie: “Yes it is. It has a giant horn sticking out of its face!”
Kenny: “It’s a unicorn… alright fine… it’s a rhino. But hey, rhinos are some strong beasts, they’re even better than horses.”
Wolfie: “Not better than camels.”
Kenny: “Yes they are. They’re stronger, and run at a top speed of thirty miles an hour. And they’ve been around for forty million years.”
Wolfie: “Upstage me you bastard!”
Mickie: “Uggg, I’m outta here. You two play with your animals.”
Wolfie: “Now look what you did. You chased my girlfriend away. And hey! Tell your rhino to quit poking around with that horn.”
Kenny: “That’s not your girlfriend, she’s mine! And my rhino will quit poking at your camel when your camel quits spitting on my rhino.”
Wolfie: “Camels spit on others to issue a warning to stand down and accept that he’s the higher rank. Show ‘em Sand Stallion!”
Camel spits on the rhino, rhino gets really mad, begins snorting and stomping its paw.
Kenny: “Watch it boy. Easy easy! Watch it! Careful!”
Wolfie: “Uh oh Sand Stallion, I think you pissed him off. I told you not to spit on him! Run Sand Stallion run! Use that extra ten mile an hour advantage! Use it and use it now boy! Be fleet of foot my Arabian friend and run like the wind!”
Camel runs, rhino chases.
*This was a comical post I made on one of her fan forums. We were talking about Mickie being WWE's Diva Of The Day, and someone mentioned how much Mickie liked horses, and that if I wanted to win her heart, I should learn to go horseback riding. I answered that post and then went into a theatrical play scenario of me trying to convince Mickie that I like horses*
Well let me just say that Mickie is my diva of the day every day! :cool:
And I'm not learning to ride a horse to impress Mickie. I don't trust horses... I suspect they are going to bite at any second!
Of course, I imagine I could always fool her into thinking I like horses. I could get a pony, and claim it's a horse; just a more compact and sporty version. Or maybe when she asks me to go riding with her I will bring a camel.
Mickie: "Jesse... Wolf ol' buddy, that is not a horse. That… that’s a camel!"
Wolfie: “No it isn’t.”
Mickie: “Yes it is. It’s like seven or eight feet tall, it’s got a gigantic neck and two humps on its back.”
Wolfie: "Hey don’t make fun of my horse… fine it's a camel. But hey, they're bigger, smarter, better, and faster than horses."
Mickie: "I don't know about better and smarter, but they're not faster than a horse."
Wolfie: "They can run at twenty five miles an hour, for a full hour. They can walk at nine miles an hour from dawn till dusk. And they can sprint at forty miles an hour. They can haul three hundred and thirty pounds comfortably, and a thousand pounds at maximum.
My camel can go weeks without water. And if I ever begin dying of thirst out in the desert, I can always tap one of these humps for some water."
Mickie: "Ok, first, that's disgusting! Secondly, those humps are fat deposits; they contain no water. Third, there is no giant stretch of desert land anywhere in Virginia. Oh, and did I mention, that's not a horse!"
Wolfie: "Whoa, it's ok there Sand Stallion, don't let her get to you. You're every bit as good as her horse or any other horse around here."
Mickie: “You’re afraid of a five and a half foot horse, but not of a seven foot Dromedary camel!?”
Wolfie: “Camels have pretty eye lashes, and they ain’t got those long mosquito-like faces like horses.”
Mickie: “Jesse, tell your camel to stop spitting on my horse!”
Wolfie: “Tell your horse to quit laughing at my camel!”
Kenny shows up.
Kenny: “Hey Hun, look at my new horse. Now we can go horse riding together. See, I’m not afraid of horses.”
Mickie: “That’s a rhinoceros!”
Kenny: “Umm, no it’s not.”
Mickie: “Yes it is. It has a giant horn sticking out of its face!”
Kenny: “It’s a unicorn… alright fine… it’s a rhino. But hey, rhinos are some strong beasts, they’re even better than horses.”
Wolfie: “Not better than camels.”
Kenny: “Yes they are. They’re stronger, and run at a top speed of thirty miles an hour. And they’ve been around for forty million years.”
Wolfie: “Upstage me you bastard!”
Mickie: “Uggg, I’m outta here. You two play with your animals.”
Wolfie: “Now look what you did. You chased my girlfriend away. And hey! Tell your rhino to quit poking around with that horn.”
Kenny: “That’s not your girlfriend, she’s mine! And my rhino will quit poking at your camel when your camel quits spitting on my rhino.”
Wolfie: “Camels spit on others to issue a warning to stand down and accept that he’s the higher rank. Show ‘em Sand Stallion!”
Camel spits on the rhino, rhino gets really mad, begins snorting and stomping its paw.
Kenny: “Watch it boy. Easy easy! Watch it! Careful!”
Wolfie: “Uh oh Sand Stallion, I think you pissed him off. I told you not to spit on him! Run Sand Stallion run! Use that extra ten mile an hour advantage! Use it and use it now boy! Be fleet of foot my Arabian friend and run like the wind!”
Camel runs, rhino chases.
My (Pseudo) Third Mickie Dream
-originally written on 10/17/06-
Another Mickie dream
I dreamed that I was that guy who was asking Mickie and Kenny for their autographs at the red light. Kenny grabbed my poster board and started to drive off with my Mickie autograph.
So I started running after the car, and it became like in Terminator 2 when the evil terminator is chasing the car and he can run at like 50 miles an hour.
Anyhow as I am chasing and gaining on them, I use my silver Sharpie like the metal-hook-arm of the terminator and I plunge it into the trunk of the car and hold on.
So there car is dragging me and I am holding on to the Sharpie for deer life and Kenny starts swerving the car from side to side, then he makes this really sharp turn and I go flying off... Without my Sharpie!!!
So I begin chasing the car to get my Sharpie back, and then the Sharpie is shaken loose from the trunk and it rolls across the road where I stand their and pick it up... but it didn't melt into my body. But it was still very much like the Terminator scene.
...
Ok, so I didn't really have that dream. But I could have!
Another Mickie dream
I dreamed that I was that guy who was asking Mickie and Kenny for their autographs at the red light. Kenny grabbed my poster board and started to drive off with my Mickie autograph.
So I started running after the car, and it became like in Terminator 2 when the evil terminator is chasing the car and he can run at like 50 miles an hour.
Anyhow as I am chasing and gaining on them, I use my silver Sharpie like the metal-hook-arm of the terminator and I plunge it into the trunk of the car and hold on.
So there car is dragging me and I am holding on to the Sharpie for deer life and Kenny starts swerving the car from side to side, then he makes this really sharp turn and I go flying off... Without my Sharpie!!!
So I begin chasing the car to get my Sharpie back, and then the Sharpie is shaken loose from the trunk and it rolls across the road where I stand their and pick it up... but it didn't melt into my body. But it was still very much like the Terminator scene.
...
Ok, so I didn't really have that dream. But I could have!
My Perfect Job
-originally written on 10/11/06-
My perfect job.
I finally figured out the career I want to spend my life doing.
I want to be Mickie’s Masseuse.
What job in the world could be better? In this job I’d get to talk to Mickie, I’d get to listen to her tell me about her problems and feelings. I’d be getting paid to touch Mickie’s body all over and give her pleasure. Yes that’s right, I’d be paid to physically pleasure Mickie and feel her gorgeous body.
And if you’re out there Mickie, and you read this message, I just want to let you know that I am pretty good at massages and I wouldn’t charge very much. I’d be willing to follow you wherever you go and I would only ask that you feed me, give me a place to stay, and pay for my travel expenses to follow you around, no other pay is necessary.
What other masseuse would offer that plan?
None.
This is the deal of a life time.
I could even learn to do your hair and give you manicures too.
See how cool it is to have obsessive stalker fans
I bet Melina doesn’t have fans as cool and dedicated as Mickie fans
My perfect job.
I finally figured out the career I want to spend my life doing.
I want to be Mickie’s Masseuse.
What job in the world could be better? In this job I’d get to talk to Mickie, I’d get to listen to her tell me about her problems and feelings. I’d be getting paid to touch Mickie’s body all over and give her pleasure. Yes that’s right, I’d be paid to physically pleasure Mickie and feel her gorgeous body.
And if you’re out there Mickie, and you read this message, I just want to let you know that I am pretty good at massages and I wouldn’t charge very much. I’d be willing to follow you wherever you go and I would only ask that you feed me, give me a place to stay, and pay for my travel expenses to follow you around, no other pay is necessary.
What other masseuse would offer that plan?
None.
This is the deal of a life time.
I could even learn to do your hair and give you manicures too.
See how cool it is to have obsessive stalker fans
I bet Melina doesn’t have fans as cool and dedicated as Mickie fans
My Second Dream About Mickie
-originally written on 10/5/06-
I had another Mickie dream last night.
I dreamed that I was at Mickie’s wedding. And she was walking down the isle. She looked so prettyful, and she had this long white wedding dress that flowed behind her. And the thought of her marrying Kenny was too much for me to bear, so I grabbed her dress and started yelling “no Mickie don’t do it. You love me. I know you love me. You were just under WWE contract not to communicate with your fans, and that’s why you never confessed your love to me” (which is actually probably true… cause I just know if Mickie were allowed to contact me she would. And she’d tell me how I am the cutest little wolf in all the land and how if she met me before Kenny it would’ve been me she was engaged to).
But anyhow, I was holding on to her dress begging her to reconsider. But she didn’t stop walking, and I wouldn’t let go of her dress, so I was being dragged across the floor. And somehow she just kept getting farther and farther away, and I was starting to get rug burns, but I wouldn’t let go.
I had another Mickie dream last night.
I dreamed that I was at Mickie’s wedding. And she was walking down the isle. She looked so prettyful, and she had this long white wedding dress that flowed behind her. And the thought of her marrying Kenny was too much for me to bear, so I grabbed her dress and started yelling “no Mickie don’t do it. You love me. I know you love me. You were just under WWE contract not to communicate with your fans, and that’s why you never confessed your love to me” (which is actually probably true… cause I just know if Mickie were allowed to contact me she would. And she’d tell me how I am the cutest little wolf in all the land and how if she met me before Kenny it would’ve been me she was engaged to).
But anyhow, I was holding on to her dress begging her to reconsider. But she didn’t stop walking, and I wouldn’t let go of her dress, so I was being dragged across the floor. And somehow she just kept getting farther and farther away, and I was starting to get rug burns, but I wouldn’t let go.
My first dream about Mickie
-originally written on 9/13/06-
I had a dream last night about Mickie. I dreamed that Mickie decided that because I had such a crush on her, that I could share her with Kenny. Kenny wasn’t happy that now he had to share his wife. I was happy with the deal. A shared Mickie is better than no Mickie.
Anyhow, we’re all laying in bed an Mickie is trying to get some sleep. I am so thrilled to be cuddled up to her. I don’t remember if I was wearing clothes or not; I know that she was naked and Kenny was dressed in his Spirit Squad outfit (thank god).
Me and Kenny weren’t doing so good on the sharing thing. Kenny put his arm around her, and so I tried to put my arm around her, but he was holding her too tight. I mentioned that Kenny was hogging her, and he started bitching. He said I could snuggle the lower half of Mickie and he’d take the upper half of Mickie. But I didn’t like that idea. I wanted to be able to see her pretty face.
So we ended up holding her hand. I held her right, and Kenny held her left. Then I decided to get daring and place my face up against her boob like it was a pillow. So Kenny gets jealous and decides to do the same thing. So now me and him are resting our head against Mickie’s boobs, and we are looking at each other face to face, and there is about one inch between our noses.
So we are both looking at each other with hatred in our eyes. Then we started struggling for hand positioning; each one of us trying to get our hand around Mickie just right. Me and Kenny start wrestling each others arm as we struggle for position. Kenny snaps and threatens to beat my ass. Mickie tells Kenny to stop bullying me and for me to stop whining so much.
Eventually Mickie gets fed up with us and kicks us out of the bedroom. So now me and Kenny are in the living room, blaming each other for getting us kicked out of the bedroom… and then that bastard wanted the couch and thought I should take the floor! Never!
Yeah pretty screwed up dream. It didn’t exactly end there; it just became weirder and farther removed from the original story that it faded on over to another dream that had nothing to do with Mickie or wrestling.
I had a dream last night about Mickie. I dreamed that Mickie decided that because I had such a crush on her, that I could share her with Kenny. Kenny wasn’t happy that now he had to share his wife. I was happy with the deal. A shared Mickie is better than no Mickie.
Anyhow, we’re all laying in bed an Mickie is trying to get some sleep. I am so thrilled to be cuddled up to her. I don’t remember if I was wearing clothes or not; I know that she was naked and Kenny was dressed in his Spirit Squad outfit (thank god).
Me and Kenny weren’t doing so good on the sharing thing. Kenny put his arm around her, and so I tried to put my arm around her, but he was holding her too tight. I mentioned that Kenny was hogging her, and he started bitching. He said I could snuggle the lower half of Mickie and he’d take the upper half of Mickie. But I didn’t like that idea. I wanted to be able to see her pretty face.
So we ended up holding her hand. I held her right, and Kenny held her left. Then I decided to get daring and place my face up against her boob like it was a pillow. So Kenny gets jealous and decides to do the same thing. So now me and him are resting our head against Mickie’s boobs, and we are looking at each other face to face, and there is about one inch between our noses.
So we are both looking at each other with hatred in our eyes. Then we started struggling for hand positioning; each one of us trying to get our hand around Mickie just right. Me and Kenny start wrestling each others arm as we struggle for position. Kenny snaps and threatens to beat my ass. Mickie tells Kenny to stop bullying me and for me to stop whining so much.
Eventually Mickie gets fed up with us and kicks us out of the bedroom. So now me and Kenny are in the living room, blaming each other for getting us kicked out of the bedroom… and then that bastard wanted the couch and thought I should take the floor! Never!
Yeah pretty screwed up dream. It didn’t exactly end there; it just became weirder and farther removed from the original story that it faded on over to another dream that had nothing to do with Mickie or wrestling.
How much of a Mickiemaniac are you?
-originally posted on 8/30/06-
What percentage of the day do you spend with thoughts of Mickie James on your mind?
I spend somewhere between 88% - 92% of the day with thoughts of Mickie dancing through my head.
It doesn't matter in what way you think about her, whether it be sexually, or her wrestling, or just how pretty she is, or how much you'd love to meet her, or even what little Photoshop graphic you can make in honor of her.
Follow up post
Well even though there are things I do, I can think about Mickie at the same time. When I'm eating, I think about how Mickie could better be booked.
When I'm practicing the guitar, I'm thinking about Mickie.
When I'm just tired, and sitting back in my recliner, resting my eyes, I'm fantasizing about Mickie putting on the ultimate women's match and silencing her critics once and for all- proving she is the wrestling ring Goddess.
When I'm pacing around listening to music, I am reflecting on Mickie's matches.
When I'm surfing the web, I am normally surfing it looking for Mickie related stuff, and thus I'm thinking about Mickie.
When I am doing yard work, I am thinking about Mickie.
When I'm doing laundry, I'm thinking about what a good husband I'd make to Mickie.
When I am surfing the web for things not related to Mickie, I am thinking about her half the time.
When I am watching wrestling, I am comparing every match to a Mickie match.
When I'm playing a video game, I'm thinking about Mickie.
And when I lay my head down to go to sleep, I am thinking about cuddling up to Mickie.. and that puts a smile on my face, and then I can fall asleep.
So as you can see, I think about Mickie a lot
Oh yeah, and when I'm on this forum reading and typing things about Mickie... I'm thinking about Mickie.
What percentage of the day do you spend with thoughts of Mickie James on your mind?
I spend somewhere between 88% - 92% of the day with thoughts of Mickie dancing through my head.
It doesn't matter in what way you think about her, whether it be sexually, or her wrestling, or just how pretty she is, or how much you'd love to meet her, or even what little Photoshop graphic you can make in honor of her.
Follow up post
Well even though there are things I do, I can think about Mickie at the same time. When I'm eating, I think about how Mickie could better be booked.
When I'm practicing the guitar, I'm thinking about Mickie.
When I'm just tired, and sitting back in my recliner, resting my eyes, I'm fantasizing about Mickie putting on the ultimate women's match and silencing her critics once and for all- proving she is the wrestling ring Goddess.
When I'm pacing around listening to music, I am reflecting on Mickie's matches.
When I'm surfing the web, I am normally surfing it looking for Mickie related stuff, and thus I'm thinking about Mickie.
When I am doing yard work, I am thinking about Mickie.
When I'm doing laundry, I'm thinking about what a good husband I'd make to Mickie.
When I am surfing the web for things not related to Mickie, I am thinking about her half the time.
When I am watching wrestling, I am comparing every match to a Mickie match.
When I'm playing a video game, I'm thinking about Mickie.
And when I lay my head down to go to sleep, I am thinking about cuddling up to Mickie.. and that puts a smile on my face, and then I can fall asleep.
So as you can see, I think about Mickie a lot
Oh yeah, and when I'm on this forum reading and typing things about Mickie... I'm thinking about Mickie.
Trying to win Mickie's heart (my Mickie cheers)
-originally written on 8/21/06-
My Mickie Cheers
I've been trying to figure out why a goddess like Mickie is going to marry.... Kenny.
I think I've figured it out. She likes cheerleaders. Think about it, Trish was once a cheerleader, and she had a massive crush on Trish. Then Mickie has dressed up like a cheerleader for photo shoots more than any other diva. Mickie also loves to come out to the ring all boppy like a cheerleader. Then she decides to marry a male cheerleader.
Apparently she likes cheerleaders.
So in order to win her heart, I am going to become a cheerleader. In fact I am going to school to become a cheerleader. I'm hoping to get my masters in cheer-leading from the same school John Cena got his doctorates degree in Thugganomics.
Now, I just got to come up with some cheers and the right pair of pom poms. And is just one referred to as a "pom"? Or does "pom pom" refer to both?
Any way, here are some of my Mickie cheers.
Mickie Mickie you’re our girl, you’re so hot you shine like a pearl.
Kill that girl in the ring, make it hurt make her sting. Goooo Mickie!! (shakes pom-poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re our babe, kick her ass break her leg. Let’s go Mickie!! (jumps up and down)
Oh Mickie you’re so fine, you win the match every time. Hey Mickie!
Oh Mickie you’re the one, that other girl’s so fat she’s so dumb, smack her around and have some fun. Gooo Mickie! (jumps up and down and shakes pom poms)
Yes Mickie it’s so true, you’re so tough, like a one woman crew.
If anyone gets in the ring with you, they’ll be hurt, they’ll be through. Go Mickie!! (claps)
(dances while singing) Sexy Mickie is a sight, shines like a diamond in the light.
First to the left, then to the right, beat their ass Mickie, fight fight fight.
Oh no, here comes Mickie James. She’s taking numbers she’s taking names. If you’re here to play games, take warning her temper burns like flames. Step in the ring with her, and you’ve got no brains. Beware of Mickie James! (shakes pom poms menacingly)
Psycho Mickie, we love her so. But White Wolf loves you more than you can know. We love how you sparkle, we love how you glow. Now get in the ring and beet that Ho. Come on Mickie, let’s go go go! (shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re so hot, that other girl is just a twat.
Beat her down, and twist her into a knot. Break her leg, break her arm. What the heck, you can even break her neck. (clap clap. Shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re so great, you’re so sexy, you’re too hot to rate. Don’t go for a three count, hit her so hard the ref could count to eight. Yay Mickie! (jumps up and down)
Hey Mickie, you’re the winner we want to see, pin that hussy one two three. (shakes right pom pom up in the air.)
Hey Mickie, I’m not lying, I’m not foolin’, you’re so hot- you got all the boys droolin’. You’re the girl the boys came to see, you’re the one all the girls wanna be. It’s you we all cheer and praise, come on McMahon, give her a raise. (shakes pom poms and kicks out legs)
Hey hey Mickie don’t you know, you’re the star of the show. We like how you move and the way you flow, hit her high, hit her low, get in the ring and beet that ho. Gooooo Mickie (jumps and shakes pom poms)
You got the look, you got the power. Some times you’re sweet, sometimes you’re sour. But you’re always pretty as a flower. When you’re not on, we’re full of boredom, you should go read your fan forum. We think you’re more than breasts and tail, You’re White Wolf’s Goddess, go send him an email. Yaaaaay Mickie! (jumps up and down ecstatically and shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie is it true, that I don’t have a chance with you? I love you now and when you grow old, I think you’re worth your weight in gold, the other divas don’t add up to a penny. But what the hell do you see in Kenny? Sure he can jump high off the ropes, but he’s killing my dreams and hopes. Don’t marry him; marry me. I got pom poms, see see see? (sarcastically shakes a pom pom)
(united fans cheer) Come on folks, clap your hands, let Mickie James hear her fans. Shout it loud, shout it proud, make some noise in the crowd. Mickie marks unite, we’re here to see Mickie fight. So hit the music, hit the spot light, This is gonna be Mickie’s night. We love you Mickie, just because- you’re the best there is, or ever was. Let’s be heard for sure, let Mickie know the fans love her. Say it loud so she can hear, say it with pride and cheer- let Mickie know her fans are here. Say it loud and say it true “Hey Mickie, We Love You!”
(everybody clap and cheer)…. (and shake pom poms if you got ‘em)
My Mickie Cheers
I've been trying to figure out why a goddess like Mickie is going to marry.... Kenny.
I think I've figured it out. She likes cheerleaders. Think about it, Trish was once a cheerleader, and she had a massive crush on Trish. Then Mickie has dressed up like a cheerleader for photo shoots more than any other diva. Mickie also loves to come out to the ring all boppy like a cheerleader. Then she decides to marry a male cheerleader.
Apparently she likes cheerleaders.
So in order to win her heart, I am going to become a cheerleader. In fact I am going to school to become a cheerleader. I'm hoping to get my masters in cheer-leading from the same school John Cena got his doctorates degree in Thugganomics.
Now, I just got to come up with some cheers and the right pair of pom poms. And is just one referred to as a "pom"? Or does "pom pom" refer to both?
Any way, here are some of my Mickie cheers.
Mickie Mickie you’re our girl, you’re so hot you shine like a pearl.
Kill that girl in the ring, make it hurt make her sting. Goooo Mickie!! (shakes pom-poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re our babe, kick her ass break her leg. Let’s go Mickie!! (jumps up and down)
Oh Mickie you’re so fine, you win the match every time. Hey Mickie!
Oh Mickie you’re the one, that other girl’s so fat she’s so dumb, smack her around and have some fun. Gooo Mickie! (jumps up and down and shakes pom poms)
Yes Mickie it’s so true, you’re so tough, like a one woman crew.
If anyone gets in the ring with you, they’ll be hurt, they’ll be through. Go Mickie!! (claps)
(dances while singing) Sexy Mickie is a sight, shines like a diamond in the light.
First to the left, then to the right, beat their ass Mickie, fight fight fight.
Oh no, here comes Mickie James. She’s taking numbers she’s taking names. If you’re here to play games, take warning her temper burns like flames. Step in the ring with her, and you’ve got no brains. Beware of Mickie James! (shakes pom poms menacingly)
Psycho Mickie, we love her so. But White Wolf loves you more than you can know. We love how you sparkle, we love how you glow. Now get in the ring and beet that Ho. Come on Mickie, let’s go go go! (shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re so hot, that other girl is just a twat.
Beat her down, and twist her into a knot. Break her leg, break her arm. What the heck, you can even break her neck. (clap clap. Shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie you’re so great, you’re so sexy, you’re too hot to rate. Don’t go for a three count, hit her so hard the ref could count to eight. Yay Mickie! (jumps up and down)
Hey Mickie, you’re the winner we want to see, pin that hussy one two three. (shakes right pom pom up in the air.)
Hey Mickie, I’m not lying, I’m not foolin’, you’re so hot- you got all the boys droolin’. You’re the girl the boys came to see, you’re the one all the girls wanna be. It’s you we all cheer and praise, come on McMahon, give her a raise. (shakes pom poms and kicks out legs)
Hey hey Mickie don’t you know, you’re the star of the show. We like how you move and the way you flow, hit her high, hit her low, get in the ring and beet that ho. Gooooo Mickie (jumps and shakes pom poms)
You got the look, you got the power. Some times you’re sweet, sometimes you’re sour. But you’re always pretty as a flower. When you’re not on, we’re full of boredom, you should go read your fan forum. We think you’re more than breasts and tail, You’re White Wolf’s Goddess, go send him an email. Yaaaaay Mickie! (jumps up and down ecstatically and shakes pom poms)
Mickie Mickie is it true, that I don’t have a chance with you? I love you now and when you grow old, I think you’re worth your weight in gold, the other divas don’t add up to a penny. But what the hell do you see in Kenny? Sure he can jump high off the ropes, but he’s killing my dreams and hopes. Don’t marry him; marry me. I got pom poms, see see see? (sarcastically shakes a pom pom)
(united fans cheer) Come on folks, clap your hands, let Mickie James hear her fans. Shout it loud, shout it proud, make some noise in the crowd. Mickie marks unite, we’re here to see Mickie fight. So hit the music, hit the spot light, This is gonna be Mickie’s night. We love you Mickie, just because- you’re the best there is, or ever was. Let’s be heard for sure, let Mickie know the fans love her. Say it loud so she can hear, say it with pride and cheer- let Mickie know her fans are here. Say it loud and say it true “Hey Mickie, We Love You!”
(everybody clap and cheer)…. (and shake pom poms if you got ‘em)
About Mickie losing her belt to Lita
-Originally written on 8/15/06-
I am kind of sad that Mickie lost her belt. But hey, it’s not like the WWE pays you less for losing a match or a title LOL.
Was it just me or was Mickie and Lita’s match actually a little boring?
Well I don’t mean that I was really bored; it was still the best match of the night, and way more entertaining than the McMahon and DX promo. But I thought Mickie vs. Lita would go down in the record books as one of the best WWE women’s matches of all time. But it was no where near that good.
For some reason, the match seemed like it was moving in slow motion. I mean I really thought for a moment my VCR was playing a little slow- like when the batteries in your Walkman started dying, and in the beginning all you’d notice is the tempo was a little slower.
With the exception of Mickie taking a nice looking bump from the title belt to the head, the bumps from both girls looked ultra weak.
Like I said, the match was still the most entertaining of the night, but it was no where near the quality I had come to expect from these two legendary performers.
But the biggest question is: why in the hell was Mickie fighting Lita last night, and why did they suddenly give the belt to Lita? It makes no sense. I guess I’ll have to tune in next week to find out where WWE is going with this story.
It was interesting that Mickie was really being pushed as the face by JR and King. I think it was funny that they seemed so disgusted at Edge for knocking Mickie’s feet off the ropes as she went for an “illegal” pin.
It’s like “That Edge, he’s despicable. I can’t believe the ordacity of that man- to kick his girlfriend’s opponent’s feet off the ropes when she was going for an illegal cover. How dare he prevent her from cheating. That monster.”
If anyone can make me hate the faces on Raw so bad, it’s JR and The King, especially JR. When someone turns face, they are pushed so hard and rammed down your throat that they are a goodie goodie Eagle Scout that can do no wrong. It’s crammed down your throat so hard it makes you gag. I hope they don’t do that with Mickie.
8/22/06 follow up post.
It sucks that Mickie lost her belt on a Raw, without even a story to build to it.
It also sucks that Mickie doesn't get any rematches and is apparently going to be out for a month- until Trish is gone.
And yes it sucks that they didn't even bother to explain why Mickie, the former women's champ, is going to be out for a month or so.
Personally I think it would have been interesting if they'd have shown a backstage vignette after Mickie lost the belt, and showed Mickie flipping out and having a breakdown. It could've been announced that Mickie had to be taken to the hospital due to her breakdown, where she is in psychiatric care.
This way Mickie could come back as a rehabilitated woman on medication to stabilize her behavior, and now she's a good girl with her head screwed on straight. Then if she ever wanted to do another heel turn, she could go off of her medication, suffer a relapse and we have our dangerous, unpredictable, emotionally unbalanced Mickie back.
If the emotional breakdown was too difficult to think up, than I agree it should have been mentioned that Mickie is out due to a concussion she suffered from the head shot with the title belt.
Considering that the writing staff consists of former soap opera writers, they could have at least said she has amnesia. Then when she comes back she is a phenomenal talent, but doesn't remember any of the evil things she has done, and thus tries to make amends, and then at the very end of her face turn, she turns heel again and apparently either got her memory back, or was faking it the whole time.
So many great potential angles for Mickie James and apparently the writers just don't want to have anything to do with her.
And yes, I am starting to have Mickie withdraws. I'm thinking about going around with a trench coat, approaching people and offering them Alexis Laree DVD's, like a drug dealer.
I am kind of sad that Mickie lost her belt. But hey, it’s not like the WWE pays you less for losing a match or a title LOL.
Was it just me or was Mickie and Lita’s match actually a little boring?
Well I don’t mean that I was really bored; it was still the best match of the night, and way more entertaining than the McMahon and DX promo. But I thought Mickie vs. Lita would go down in the record books as one of the best WWE women’s matches of all time. But it was no where near that good.
For some reason, the match seemed like it was moving in slow motion. I mean I really thought for a moment my VCR was playing a little slow- like when the batteries in your Walkman started dying, and in the beginning all you’d notice is the tempo was a little slower.
With the exception of Mickie taking a nice looking bump from the title belt to the head, the bumps from both girls looked ultra weak.
Like I said, the match was still the most entertaining of the night, but it was no where near the quality I had come to expect from these two legendary performers.
But the biggest question is: why in the hell was Mickie fighting Lita last night, and why did they suddenly give the belt to Lita? It makes no sense. I guess I’ll have to tune in next week to find out where WWE is going with this story.
It was interesting that Mickie was really being pushed as the face by JR and King. I think it was funny that they seemed so disgusted at Edge for knocking Mickie’s feet off the ropes as she went for an “illegal” pin.
It’s like “That Edge, he’s despicable. I can’t believe the ordacity of that man- to kick his girlfriend’s opponent’s feet off the ropes when she was going for an illegal cover. How dare he prevent her from cheating. That monster.”
If anyone can make me hate the faces on Raw so bad, it’s JR and The King, especially JR. When someone turns face, they are pushed so hard and rammed down your throat that they are a goodie goodie Eagle Scout that can do no wrong. It’s crammed down your throat so hard it makes you gag. I hope they don’t do that with Mickie.
8/22/06 follow up post.
It sucks that Mickie lost her belt on a Raw, without even a story to build to it.
It also sucks that Mickie doesn't get any rematches and is apparently going to be out for a month- until Trish is gone.
And yes it sucks that they didn't even bother to explain why Mickie, the former women's champ, is going to be out for a month or so.
Personally I think it would have been interesting if they'd have shown a backstage vignette after Mickie lost the belt, and showed Mickie flipping out and having a breakdown. It could've been announced that Mickie had to be taken to the hospital due to her breakdown, where she is in psychiatric care.
This way Mickie could come back as a rehabilitated woman on medication to stabilize her behavior, and now she's a good girl with her head screwed on straight. Then if she ever wanted to do another heel turn, she could go off of her medication, suffer a relapse and we have our dangerous, unpredictable, emotionally unbalanced Mickie back.
If the emotional breakdown was too difficult to think up, than I agree it should have been mentioned that Mickie is out due to a concussion she suffered from the head shot with the title belt.
Considering that the writing staff consists of former soap opera writers, they could have at least said she has amnesia. Then when she comes back she is a phenomenal talent, but doesn't remember any of the evil things she has done, and thus tries to make amends, and then at the very end of her face turn, she turns heel again and apparently either got her memory back, or was faking it the whole time.
So many great potential angles for Mickie James and apparently the writers just don't want to have anything to do with her.
And yes, I am starting to have Mickie withdraws. I'm thinking about going around with a trench coat, approaching people and offering them Alexis Laree DVD's, like a drug dealer.
Red Crusade, getting to meet Mickie
-originally written on 8/10/06-
*A forum friend, Red Crusade, on mickiejames.com was getting to meet Mickie*
So how is it that you are getting to see her? How long will you get to see her?
I would be too nervous to approach Mickie. I’d be afraid I’d just stand there tongue tied babbling incoherently. Something like this:
“hi! Hi there. Yes, hi. Um, I’m umm… I’m… Uh, it begins with a J. Unimportant. Well not that I’m unimportant, just my name. Your name is Mickie James. I like you. I love you. Can I hug you? No! I shouldn’t have asked, I’m sure there’s like a no touching policy. Can I have your name on a piece a paper and stuff, a signature thingy. Autograph that’s what I mean. Oh and my name is Jesse. Mickie Jesse.. erm.. Jesse James, I mean.. Autograph, can I have your autograph? Have you ever read my comments on your message board? I go there a lot. Gosh you sure are pretty.” Razz
And then Mickie’s Coffee would be standing behind me and be like “Wolfie, Jesse, whatever, dude can you move it along, we want to get an autograph too” and I’d be like “sure, who should I make it out to? Oh you meant you wanted Mickie’s Autograph?” Embarassed
And then security would throw me out and stuff. Yeah, it’s probably better that you’re going and not me.
You know how when you were a kid and you were about to eat something, and your brother would lick it and say “my germ” and then you wouldn’t want to eat it, so he’d get to have it?
If I ever met Mickie I’d probably run up to her, lick her, and tell Kenny “my germ!”
Something tells me I wouldn’t get her though.
So who wants to bet Mickie takes out a restraining order on me before Red Crusade gets an autograph? Laughing
*follow up
*After Red Crusade got Mickie's autograph, I made fun of him for asking her to sign his cigarettes, and made this little comedy skit*
Red Crusade: "Hey Mickie, could you please sign, and thus endorse, my cancer sticks? And could you make that out to Red Crusade? If you used my actual name I'd just forget the autograph was mine."
Mickie James: "To my obsessive cyber pal, Red Crusade- Have a good smoke~ Mickie James"
*next up, a hippy dude*
Hippy: "uhh, hey Mickie. You signed that dude's smokes... cool... would you sign my Bong? Yeah, Thanks."
Mickie: "To Hippyguy, who is too stoned to remember his name, it's always high time with your pal~ Mickie James."
*next up White Wolf*
Wolf: "wow you sign smokes and bongs.. cool. Hey could you sign this?"
Mickie "what is it?"
Wolf: "just sign your name on the dotted line."
Mickie: "This is a marriage contract! I'm not signing this!"
Wolf: "Hey! I paid twenty bucks to get your signature, and I want that signature right here!"
Mickie: "Security!"
Wolf: "Oh God!"
Exclamation Runs away from an irate Kenny
*A forum friend, Red Crusade, on mickiejames.com was getting to meet Mickie*
So how is it that you are getting to see her? How long will you get to see her?
I would be too nervous to approach Mickie. I’d be afraid I’d just stand there tongue tied babbling incoherently. Something like this:
“hi! Hi there. Yes, hi. Um, I’m umm… I’m… Uh, it begins with a J. Unimportant. Well not that I’m unimportant, just my name. Your name is Mickie James. I like you. I love you. Can I hug you? No! I shouldn’t have asked, I’m sure there’s like a no touching policy. Can I have your name on a piece a paper and stuff, a signature thingy. Autograph that’s what I mean. Oh and my name is Jesse. Mickie Jesse.. erm.. Jesse James, I mean.. Autograph, can I have your autograph? Have you ever read my comments on your message board? I go there a lot. Gosh you sure are pretty.” Razz
And then Mickie’s Coffee would be standing behind me and be like “Wolfie, Jesse, whatever, dude can you move it along, we want to get an autograph too” and I’d be like “sure, who should I make it out to? Oh you meant you wanted Mickie’s Autograph?” Embarassed
And then security would throw me out and stuff. Yeah, it’s probably better that you’re going and not me.
You know how when you were a kid and you were about to eat something, and your brother would lick it and say “my germ” and then you wouldn’t want to eat it, so he’d get to have it?
If I ever met Mickie I’d probably run up to her, lick her, and tell Kenny “my germ!”
Something tells me I wouldn’t get her though.
So who wants to bet Mickie takes out a restraining order on me before Red Crusade gets an autograph? Laughing
*follow up
*After Red Crusade got Mickie's autograph, I made fun of him for asking her to sign his cigarettes, and made this little comedy skit*
Red Crusade: "Hey Mickie, could you please sign, and thus endorse, my cancer sticks? And could you make that out to Red Crusade? If you used my actual name I'd just forget the autograph was mine."
Mickie James: "To my obsessive cyber pal, Red Crusade- Have a good smoke~ Mickie James"
*next up, a hippy dude*
Hippy: "uhh, hey Mickie. You signed that dude's smokes... cool... would you sign my Bong? Yeah, Thanks."
Mickie: "To Hippyguy, who is too stoned to remember his name, it's always high time with your pal~ Mickie James."
*next up White Wolf*
Wolf: "wow you sign smokes and bongs.. cool. Hey could you sign this?"
Mickie "what is it?"
Wolf: "just sign your name on the dotted line."
Mickie: "This is a marriage contract! I'm not signing this!"
Wolf: "Hey! I paid twenty bucks to get your signature, and I want that signature right here!"
Mickie: "Security!"
Wolf: "Oh God!"
Exclamation Runs away from an irate Kenny
Mickie Engaged To Kenny!?!?
-originally written on 8/7/06-
*This is one of many comical and memorable posts I made on the official Mickie James forum www.mickiejames.com*
Mickie is engaged to Kenny!?
No tell me it’s not true! My Mickie… engaged… to Kenny… of the Spirit squad?
I picked up the guitar and tried to become a rocker to get girls… Kenny picks up a set of pompoms and gets Mickie James. That is so uncool.
Uh oh, I feel myself starting to go through the motions of heartbreak.
1. Denial: No she can’t be engaged to Kenny; he’s a freakin’ cheerleader! This has to be one of those vicious internet rumor things. I don’t believe it! I won’t believe it. Oh god tell me this isn’t happening.
2. Panic: I have to do something. I have to stop this wedding. I have to show her she’s making a mistake, that I’m the guy she needs to marry. Mickie! Mickie, I love you! Don’t do this Mickie, I beg you!
3. Anger: I’m not good enough for you? Is that IT!? I’m just some internet geek you’ve never met, and thus Kenny is such a better choice! How dare you! You… You were lucky that I even cared about you! See if I ever care about you again! You broke my heart, And now I’m gonna break you!
4. Sorrow: So that’s it huh? My little Mickie has her eyes set on some other boy. *sniffle sniffle* My love, my caring, my admiration, my dreams and erotic fantasies; all down the drain. Oh it hurts! All I ever wanted was to put my arms around her and just hold her for a little bit *cries* I just wanted to be Mickie’s boy toy.
5. Acceptance: Oh well, easy come, easy go. My heart may have been crushed, my dreams ruined, but Mickie will always be my favorite Diva. And I will continue to praise her and chant her name when she’s in the ring.
But Mickie, I got to know, what does he have that I don’t? Besides a nice body, a semi-hansom face, fame, money, a job, a car, a license to drive that car, is own house, wrestling skills. Sure he may have all those things, but take away those shiny superficial things and what are ya left with- Me.
Hmm, I don’t come out sounding too good in that.
Let me put it to you another way: Sure he’s got a lot going for him right now, but will he hold you tenderly at night?
Will he snuggle you like a blanket when you sit down to relax?
Will he always make sure that you get more of the blanket when you’re in bed?
Will he make you smile every morning by walking up behind you in the mirror, putting his arms around you from behind, placing his face beside yours, look into the mirror at your faces together and tell you how beautiful you are?
Will he take care of you when you’re sick and nurse you back to health no matter how much you complain from being all ill and cranky?
Will he share his deepest secrets with you, and lock away all of your secret confessions so that you know your secrets will never reach anyone’s ears?
Will he hold you tight and let you cry on him hard, and wipe away your salty, hot stinging tears, and never lose an ounce of respect for you?
Will he cherish and protect your vulnerable side, never allowing the world outside of you and him to know that you’re not always strong and in control?
Will his fingers be crossed during every wrestling performance you give, just hoping that everything goes perfect?
Will he listen to you, deep down into your heart, the things you believe, the things you want, the things you fear?
Will he have the courage to be afraid in front of you?
Will he tell you every morning that you are the greatest female performer in the business, and truly mean it?
Will Kenny do all of these things that I would?
What? He would do all that? He does do all of that? Well then, if he’s so damn good, a regular prince charming, than why don’t you just go out and marry him!!!
Oh, you are marrying him. Well… I’m glad you took my advice there.
But if things don’t work out between you and him, Mickie, I will always be here for you, with my arms out, just waiting for you to break my heart all over again by finding some other guy, who isn’t me, to marry.
Besides, there’s always my second crush: Alexis Laree.
What!? What do you mean they’re the same person!?? Damn I can’t catch a break can I?
*This is one of many comical and memorable posts I made on the official Mickie James forum www.mickiejames.com*
Mickie is engaged to Kenny!?
No tell me it’s not true! My Mickie… engaged… to Kenny… of the Spirit squad?
I picked up the guitar and tried to become a rocker to get girls… Kenny picks up a set of pompoms and gets Mickie James. That is so uncool.
Uh oh, I feel myself starting to go through the motions of heartbreak.
1. Denial: No she can’t be engaged to Kenny; he’s a freakin’ cheerleader! This has to be one of those vicious internet rumor things. I don’t believe it! I won’t believe it. Oh god tell me this isn’t happening.
2. Panic: I have to do something. I have to stop this wedding. I have to show her she’s making a mistake, that I’m the guy she needs to marry. Mickie! Mickie, I love you! Don’t do this Mickie, I beg you!
3. Anger: I’m not good enough for you? Is that IT!? I’m just some internet geek you’ve never met, and thus Kenny is such a better choice! How dare you! You… You were lucky that I even cared about you! See if I ever care about you again! You broke my heart, And now I’m gonna break you!
4. Sorrow: So that’s it huh? My little Mickie has her eyes set on some other boy. *sniffle sniffle* My love, my caring, my admiration, my dreams and erotic fantasies; all down the drain. Oh it hurts! All I ever wanted was to put my arms around her and just hold her for a little bit *cries* I just wanted to be Mickie’s boy toy.
5. Acceptance: Oh well, easy come, easy go. My heart may have been crushed, my dreams ruined, but Mickie will always be my favorite Diva. And I will continue to praise her and chant her name when she’s in the ring.
But Mickie, I got to know, what does he have that I don’t? Besides a nice body, a semi-hansom face, fame, money, a job, a car, a license to drive that car, is own house, wrestling skills. Sure he may have all those things, but take away those shiny superficial things and what are ya left with- Me.
Hmm, I don’t come out sounding too good in that.
Let me put it to you another way: Sure he’s got a lot going for him right now, but will he hold you tenderly at night?
Will he snuggle you like a blanket when you sit down to relax?
Will he always make sure that you get more of the blanket when you’re in bed?
Will he make you smile every morning by walking up behind you in the mirror, putting his arms around you from behind, placing his face beside yours, look into the mirror at your faces together and tell you how beautiful you are?
Will he take care of you when you’re sick and nurse you back to health no matter how much you complain from being all ill and cranky?
Will he share his deepest secrets with you, and lock away all of your secret confessions so that you know your secrets will never reach anyone’s ears?
Will he hold you tight and let you cry on him hard, and wipe away your salty, hot stinging tears, and never lose an ounce of respect for you?
Will he cherish and protect your vulnerable side, never allowing the world outside of you and him to know that you’re not always strong and in control?
Will his fingers be crossed during every wrestling performance you give, just hoping that everything goes perfect?
Will he listen to you, deep down into your heart, the things you believe, the things you want, the things you fear?
Will he have the courage to be afraid in front of you?
Will he tell you every morning that you are the greatest female performer in the business, and truly mean it?
Will Kenny do all of these things that I would?
What? He would do all that? He does do all of that? Well then, if he’s so damn good, a regular prince charming, than why don’t you just go out and marry him!!!
Oh, you are marrying him. Well… I’m glad you took my advice there.
But if things don’t work out between you and him, Mickie, I will always be here for you, with my arms out, just waiting for you to break my heart all over again by finding some other guy, who isn’t me, to marry.
Besides, there’s always my second crush: Alexis Laree.
What!? What do you mean they’re the same person!?? Damn I can’t catch a break can I?
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